Oh Crap! What if I’m a dynamo and not a slacker?
Once the hilarity of the situation subsided, I slipped into contemplation. Isn’t it interesting that with all I’ve accomplished, with all the change I’ve successfully maneuvered through and all the growth I’ve enjoyed, I still relate to myself on a core level as a slacker? I decided to do what I do best when something doesn’t make sense. I decided to look at the facts.
Yes, I had a childhood filled with uncertainty and lack, leading to idleness fueled by emotional paralysis, but I’ve done the work and continue to sort through that pain. Yes, I spent a large chunk of my life struggling with chronic fatigue and overall ill health, but with time, dedication, inner work and reprioritization, I now enjoy wellness in great measure. Yes, I used to spend the majority of my non-working hours hunkered down horizontally in communion with my favorite cohort: the TV, but today I maintain a healthy and balanced relationship with “the tube”.
I have learned not to use the proverbial measuring stick to compare myself to others since: a) I’m unique and guided by my own rhythms, b) I’m not here to live your life, I’m here to live mine, and c) it’s a waste of my precious time and energy; however, when measuring myself against myself, I find even more evidence of enormous strides in my recent history:
- With little knowledge and no guidance, I built and maintain a website for my business
- I’ve taken classes and pursued training that inspires me personally and professionally
- I’ve developed strategies to promote improved health, and most notably
- I’ve begun to set goals, have allowed myself to dream big then taken appropriate actions to get there.
Dynamo… slacker… dynamo… slacker. The truth is I’m neither. I'm a human being having experiences across the entire spectrum of action and productivity. In my future, there are bound to be more times of great movement and alternatively, more times of rest and peace. Being a self-perceived slacker is certainly a low pressure, low expectation existence, but I know in my heart that believing in my astonishing capabilities is the true key to where I want to be.
Where do I go from here? Okay, the new plan is to NOT be surprised when I’m a hard-working, tirelessly energetic person ("a dynamo") and to NO LONGER define myself by periods of less than monumental production. GOOD PLAN!!! Now, I’m tired and headed to bed for a glorious guilt-free afternoon nap.
Loving me,
Categories: Personal Growth
Tags: slacker action dynamo productivity
I am so inspired by your wisdom and ability to write so transparently! I look forward to your next blog post!
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Thank you! I was so inspired by this....a wonderfully written reminder for me (and others, I'm sure) to give m'self a break!
Loved it.
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Perhaps someday we won't need reminders to give ourselves a break, but until then I love it when people remind me and I'm excited to be paying it forward. Have a great day, Syda!
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This happens to everybody, you just described myself really.
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For me, that is the real gift of blogging. I get to share my experiences and perceptions of them authentically and learn through my readers how universally we are all connected. In an article titled "The Butterfly: A Symbol of Our Transformation" found on www.intentionalbutterly.com, Tanis Helliwell writes "Just as there are thousands of species of butterflies, each one of us is totally unique, but our process of transformation leads to the same final result. I enjoy sharing my stories and hearing about yours. We can create community and thrive versus isolated withering. Thanks for reading,
Suzanne,
Creator of the Delighted Sage Blog
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Really this is an amazing site, because the topic is informative,
regards to all,
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I'm glad to hear you're enjoying the blog. There has been a short break in entries as I am busy assisting my husband with his recovery from major surgery, but a new post is coming very soon. Best wishes to you for a fantastic 2010!
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What a nice way to motivate yourself, each day we should always think positive to attract good luck on our side and enjoy each day that we spend on this world.
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Hey Suzanne, you really inspired me, to start taking my life a little slowly and take out time for some guilt free leisure.
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I wanted to thank you for this excellent read!! I definitely loved every little bit of it. I have you bookmarked your web site to check out the latest stuff you post.
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I think that we as women have a habit of being too hard on ourselves. We see ourselves as the one responsible for fixing everything, and it can make us feel inadequate if we can't do it all. You're doing great....continue praising yourself!
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Thank you for another beautifully supportive comment. Learning to praise myself was an awkward and unnatural exercise. Habitaully, I was much more adept at self-admonishment. However, I highly recommend the effort because our internal powers to lift or degrade ourselves is strong, and I'm of the mindset that I can use all the allies I can get in this life.
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